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Create the ultimate turbo trainer pain cave

23 Dec 2016

Want to create your own little world of suffering? Then we'd recommend this little lot to get you started...

Turbo trainer

Tacx Vortex Smart £400,

This cracking machine is one of a new generation of trainers.

Much like your phone (presumably) this trainer is a ‘smart’ device and can wirelessly connect to online training apps via your mobile or laptop using Bluetooth or ANT+.

This means it can be paired with apps like Zwift, which feed back to the trainer to adjust the resistance level according to the terrain of your virtual ride – for example, increasing resistance to mimic climbs.

The magnetic resistance unit is capable of simulating gradients up to a leg-busting 25%!


Dyson Pure Hot + Cool Link £500,

Having a fan that cools you is one thing, but having one that also purifies the air it blasts at you is on a whole other level.

This bladeless fan automatically removes 99.95% of allergens and pollutants in the air, which is great if you’re setting your pain cave up in a dusty garden shed.

This fan/heater also comes with a timer that you can set via your phone. So should your pain cave be set up in your garage, say, you can heat it up to non-Arctic conditions before you get out there and train in it.


55in LG Super UHD TV £1,050,

Well, it wouldn’t be the ultimate pain cave without an obscenely impressive screen to stare at and keep our mind off the suffering.

This bad boy is Ultra High Definition, four times as clear as standard Full HD.

With a greater scale of colour and sound, your favourite training video will be transformed and you’ll feel as close to being out on the tarmac as possible.

It also comes with its own Smart capabilities and has services like Freeview’s catch up and on demand features, meaning you’ll never miss another Bake Off ever again!


Samsung Level Over Wireless Headphones £300,

Sometimes you may want to forgo the telly and just get your head down and pedal with some inspiring music.

Trainers often aren’t the quietest of devices – especially at the cheaper end of the market – so playing music via headphones is an ideal way to drown out their sound without risking a noise abatement order from the council.

These headphones from Samsung are great – not only are they wireless (we always get tangled up before we’re even on the bike), they have touchscreen volume control, pause, fast forward and rewind, so you don’t even need to get your phone out to change the track.

Water bottle

Elite Turacio Jossanova Thermal Bottle £15,

With its nature-friendly cork insulation this little guy can keep your drinks cool (or warm, if you’re of that persuasion) so you can top up with liquids at the temperature you want.

We love this bottle not only for its whopping size (500ml) but its use of cork as an insulator which, when we tested it earlier in the year, proved highly effective.

A towel

Model’s own

Yes, we know it’s winter but you’re inside, remember, and you’ll be surprised at just how sweaty things can get, so having a good towel to hand is a must!

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